《少有人走的路》读书笔记 Part1：人生困难重重

《少有人走的路：心智成熟的旅程》是一本通俗的心理学著作，也是一本伟大的心理学著作，它出自我们这个时代最杰出的心理医生斯科特·派克。斯科特的杰出不仅在于他的智慧，更在于他的诚恳和勇气。他第一次说出了人们从来不敢说的话，提醒了人们从来不敢提醒的事，这就是：几乎人人都有心理问题，只不过程度不同而已；几乎人人都有程度不同的心理疾病，只不过得病的时间不同而已。

《少有人走的路》这本书处处透露出沟通与理解的意味，它跨越时代限制，帮助我们探索爱的本质，引导我们过上崭新，宁静而丰富的生活；它帮助我们学习爱，也学习独立；它教诲我们成为更称职的、更有理解心的父母。归根到底，它告诉我们怎样找到真正的自我。

正如开篇所言：人生苦难重重。M·斯科特·派克让我们更加清楚：人生是一场艰辛之旅，心智成熟的旅程相当漫长。但是，他没有让我们感到恐惧，相反，他带领我们去经历一系列艰难乃至痛苦的转变，最终达到自我认知的更高境界。

我们U君先带大家来读一下这本书的part 1，理论性的句子比较多，等到后面就会有很多有启发性的小故事和案例，引我们深思。

《The Road Less Traveled》 Book one

Part 1 Problems and Pain

【注释版】笔记整理：微信公众号KindleStar，微博@YouTube君学英语；

Life is difficult. This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths. It is a great truth because once we truly see this truth, we transcend it. Once we truly know that life is difficult -- once we truly understand and accept it -- then life is no longer difficult. Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters.

【单词】transcend 英 [træn'send] vt. 胜过，超越。

这个单词比较重要，也非常高级。来自古法语transcendre "transcend, surpass,超过" ，来自拉丁语transcendere "climb over or beyond翻过, surmount战胜, overstep逾越," ；词根scend表示“climb爬，登”，前缀trans表示"超过，越过" 。所以trans+scend=超越。

相关词汇还有：

ascend [a-=ad-表示to，scend爬;’爬上”] v.上升;登高，攀登

ascendent [见上，-ent形容词后缀，…的] a.上升的，向上的

ascent [ə'sent][见上，由ascend转成的名词] n.上升，升高，登高

reascend [re-再，ascend上升] v.再上升，再升高

descend [de-下，向下，scend爬] v.下降，传下，遗传

descender [见上，-er表示人和物] 下降者，下降物

descendent [见上，-ent表示人;’传下来的人”] 子孙，后代，后裔

descent [dɪ'send][见上，由descend转成的名词] 下降，降下

redescend [re-再，descend下降] 再下降

condescend [con-表示加强意义，descend下降卑谦] 谦逊，俯就，屈尊

condescension [见上，-ion名词后缀] 屈尊

【译文】人生苦难重重。这是个伟大的真理，是世界上最伟大的真理之一。它的伟大．在于我们一旦想通了它，就能实现人生的超越。只要我们知道人生是艰难的——只要我们真正理解并接受这一点，那么我们就再也不会对人生的苦难耿耿于怀了。

Most do not fully see this truth that life is difficult. Instead they moan more or less incessantly, noisily or subtly, about the enormity of their problems, their burdens, and their difficulties as if life were generally easy, as if life should be easy. They voice their belief, noisily or subtly, that their difficulties represent a unique kind of affliction that should not be and that has somehow been especially visited upon them, or else upon their families, their tribe, their class, their nation, their race or even their species, and not upon others. I know about this moaning because I have done my share.

【单词】

1.incessant：[ɪn'ses(ə)nt] adj. 不断的；不停的；连续的；

词根cess来自拉丁语cessare "to cease停息" ，in-为否定前缀，所以in（否定）+cess（停）+ant（形容词后缀）=不停的。

相关词汇：cease v.n.停止；ceaseless adj.不停的；

2.enormity [ɪ'nɔːmɪtɪ] n. 巨大；暴行；极恶；

词根norm来自拉丁语norma "rule, norm规则，规范"，前缀e来自ex-，表示“超出”。所以e/ex"out of"+ norm+ity（名词后缀）=超出规范=巨大。

相关词汇：enormous adj. 庞大的，巨大的；凶暴的，极恶的

norm n.规范，行为准则

normal a.正常的(norm+al有规范的正常的)

abnormal a.异常的，反常的(ab否定前缀+normal正常的)

subnormal a.低于标准的，低能的(sub在下面+normal正常的)

transnormal a.超常规的，异常的(trans超+normal正常的)

3.affliction [ə'flɪkʃ(ə)n] n. 苦难；苦恼；折磨

词根flict表示“打击”

afflict [af-表示at，to等意义，flict打击] 使苦恼，折磨

affliction [见上，-ion名词后缀] 苦恼，折磨，苦事

afflictive [见上，-ive…的] 使人苦恼的，折磨人的

conflict [con-共同，flict打击，’共同打”彼此互打] 冲突，战斗，交锋，斗争

inflict [in-使，作，flict打击;’给以打击”] 予以打击，使遭受痛苦，加弄，处罚

infliction [见上，-ion名词后缀] 使受痛苦，处罚

4.families, their tribe, their class, their nation, their race or even their species

社会单位从小到大排序：家庭，部落宗族，阶层，国家，种族，物种。

【译文】

然而，大部分人却不愿正视它。在他们看来，似乎人生本该既舒适又顺利。他们不是怨天尤人，就是抱怨自己生而不幸，他们总是哀叹无数麻烦、压力、困难与其为伴，他们认为自己是世界上最不幸的人，命运偏偏让他们自己、他们的家人、他们的部落、他们的社会阶级、他们的国家和民族乃至他们的人种吃苦受罪，而别的人却安然无恙，活得自由而又幸福——我熟悉类似的抱怨和诅咒，因为我也曾有过同样的感受。

Life is a series of problems. Do we want to moan about them or solve them? Do we want to teach our children to solve them? Discipline（纪律） is the basic set of tools we require to solve life's problems. Without discipline we can solve nothing. With only some discipline we can solve only some problems. With total discipline we can solve all problem.

【译文】人生是一连串的难题，面对它，你是哭哭啼啼，还是勇敢奋起?你是束手无策地哀叹，还是积极地想方设法解决问题，并慷慨地将方法传给后人呢？解决人生问题的首要方案，乃是自律，缺少了这一环，你不可能解决任何麻烦和困难。局部的自律只能解决局部的问题，完整的自律才能解决所有的问题。

What makes life difficult is that the process of confronting and solving problems is a painful one. Problems, depending upon their nature, evoke in us frustration or grief or sadness or loneliness or guilt or regret or anger or fear or anxiety or anguish or despair. These are uncomfortable feelings, often very uncomfortable, often as painful as any kind of physical pain, sometimes equaling the very worst kind of physical pain. Indeed, it is because of the pain that events or conflicts engender in us all that we call them problems. And since life poses an endless series of problems, life is always difficult and is full of pain as well as joy.

【单词】

1.evoke [ɪ'vəʊk] vt. 引起，唤起；博得。词根vok/voc来自拉丁语vocare "to call"喊，叫。 ex "out" + voke=喊出来=唤起。

advocate v.拥护;倡议(ad增强+voc+ate增强声音拥护)

revoke v.取消，撤回(re回+vok+e喊回来取消)

revocable a.可废除的(revoke+able)

irrevocable a.不能改变的(ir不+revocable不可废除的)

vociferous a.喧闹的(voc+i+fer带来+ous带来声音的喧闹的)

provoke v.触怒，煽动(pro前面+vok+e到[别人]面前喊激怒)

provocative a.激怒人的，激发人的(pro+voc+ative)

2.frustration or grief or sadness or loneliness or guilt or regret or anger or fear or anxiety or anguish（痛苦） or despair. 这些都是我们人类比较常见的情绪，也都是非常重要的词汇。

3.engender [ɪn'dʒendə; en-] vt. 使产生；造成vi. 产生；引起

词根gen=birth,produce“出生，产生”，例如：

engender v 产生（en使+gender产生使产生）

generate v 产生；发电（genner+ate 产生[电]等）

generation n 产生；一代（(generate+ion)

generator n 发电机；生殖者（generate+or产生[电]的东西发电机）

regenerate v 再生，重生（re再+generate)

generous a 慷慨的；丰富的（gener+ous[不断]产生丰富的，慷慨的）

generosity n 慷慨（gener+osity多的状态多产生慷慨）

degenerate v 堕落；衰退（de坏+gener+ate往坏产生堕落）

heterogeneous a 不同的（hetero异+gen+eous产生不同的）

homogeneous a 同种的（homo同+gen+eous产生相同的）

【译文】生活中遇到问题，这本身就是一种痛苦，解决它们，就会带来新的痛苦。各种问题结队而来，使我们疲于奔命，不断经受沮丧、悲哀、难过、寂寞、内疚、懊丧、恼怒、恐惧、焦虑、痛苦和绝望的打击，从而不知道自由和舒适为何物。心灵之痛。 通常和肉体之痛一样剧烈，甚至更加难以承受。正是由于人生的矛盾和冲突带来的痛苦如此强烈，我们才把它们称为问题；正是因为各种问题接踵而来，我们才觉得人生苦难重重，悲喜参半。

Yet it is in this whole process of meeting and solving problems that life has its meaning. Problems are the cutting edge that distinguishes between success and failure. Problems call forth our courage and our wisdom; indeed, they create our courage and our wisdom. It is only because of problems that we grow mentally and spiritually. When we desire to encourage the growth of the human spirit, we challenge and encourage the human capacity to solve problems, just as in school we deliberately set problems for our children to solve. It is through the pain of confronting and resolving problems that we learn. As Benjamin Franklin said, "Those things that hurt, instruct." It is for this reason that wise people learn not to dread（担心） but actually to welcome problems and actually to welcome the pain of problems.

【知识点】

1.cutting edge 刀刃，引申为分水岭。

2.It is only because of problems that we grow mentally and spiritually.

正是因为有了问题，才能使我们思想和心智不断成熟。此处为强调句式：it is…that……，写作时我们都可以用上，显得比较高级。正常语序可以写成：because of problems, we grow mentally and spiritually. 本段的最后一句话同样是强调句式。

【译文】人生是一个面对问题并解决问题的过程。问题能启发我们的智慧，激发我们的勇气；问题是我们成功与失败的分水岭。 为解决问题而付出努力，能使思想和心智不断成熟。学校为孩子们设计各种问题，促使他们动脑筋、想办法。恐怕也是基于这样的考虑。我们的心灵渴望成长，渴望迎接成功而不是遭受失败，所以它会释放出最大的潜力，尽可能将所有问题解决。

面对问题和解决问题的痛苦，能让我们得到最好的学习。美国开国先哲本杰明·富兰克林说过：“惟有痛苦才会带来教益。” 面对问题，聪明者不因害怕痛苦而选择逃避，而是迎上前去。

Most of us are not so wise. Fearing the pain involved, almost all of us, to a greater or lesser degree, attempt to avoid problems. We procrastinate（拖延）, hoping that they will go away. We ignore them, forget them, pretend they do not exist. We even take drugs to assist us in ignoring them, so that by deadening（deaden，使削弱，使麻木） ourselves to the pain we can forget the problems that cause the pain. We attempt to skirt around problems rather than meet them head on. We attempt to get out of them rather than suffer through them. This tendency to avoid problems and the emotional suffering inherent（固有的） in them is the primary basis of all human mental illness. Since most of us have this tendency to a greater or lesser degree, most of us are mentally ill to a greater or lesser degree, lacking complete mental health. Some of us will go to quite extraordinary lengths to avoid our problems and the suffering they cause, proceeding far afield from all that is clearly good and sensible in order to try to find an easy way out, building the most elaborate fantasies in which to live, sometimes to the total exclusion of reality. In the succinctly elegant words of Carl Jung, "Neurosis is always a substitute for legitimate suffering."

【知识点】

1.to a greater or lesser degree在某种程度上，或多或少的。类似于more or less，写作时能用上这个表达会显得非常高级。

2.skirt [skɜːt] n. 裙子

vt. 绕过，回避；位于…边缘

vi. 沿边走，绕开；环绕

表示“迂回，绕过”的非常重要的词还有detour.

3.The tendency to do sth.这种用法比较高级，我们在写作中可以应用，比tend to do要更加地道、更加书面。例如：

Perhaps because human beings have the tendency to forget that they are ultimatelyresponsible for their own lives?

可能是因为人类倾向于忘记他们最终是要对他们自己的生命负责的？

4.go to quite extraordinary lengths尽一切可能。

The wise men were willing to go to any length to find the truth.

聪明人通常愿意为找到真理走任何路。

5.succinct adj. 简洁的。非常高级的近义词还有terse，concise.

6.neurosis n. [心理] 神经症；神经衰弱症 neuro n.神经； neurologist 神经学家。

【译文】遗憾的是，大多数人似乎不是聪明者。在某种程度上，人人都害怕承受痛苦，遇到问题就慌不择路，望风而逃。有的人不断拖延时间，等待问题自行消失；有的人对问题视而不见，或尽量忘记它们的存在；有的人与麻醉药和毒品为伴，想把问题排除在意识之外，换得片刻解脱。我们总是规避问题。而不是与问题正面搏击；我们只想远离问题，却不想www.dhgcn.com经受解决闻题带来的痛苦。 规避问题和逃避痛苦的趋向，是人类心理疾病的根源。人人都有逃避问题的倾读书笔记大全向。因此大多数人的心理健康都存在缺陷，真正的健康者寥寥无几。有的逃避问题者，宁可躲藏在头脑营造的虚幻世界里，甚至完全与现实脱节，这无异于作茧自缚。 心理学大师荣格更是明确地指出： “神经官能症，是人生痛苦常见的替代品。”

But the substitute itself ultimately becomes more painful than the legitimate suffering it was designed to avoid. The neurosis itself becomes the biggest problem. True to form（一如既往）, many will then attempt to avoid this pain and this problem in turn, building layer upon layer of neurosis. Fortunately, however, some possess the courage to face their neuroses and begin -- usually with the help of psychotherapy（心理疗法） -- to learn how to experience legitimate suffering. In any case, when we avoid the legitimate suffering that results from dealing with problems, we also avoid the growth that problems demand from us. It is for this reason that in chronic mental illness we stop growing, we become stuck. And without healing, the human spirit begins to shrivel（萎缩）.

替代品带来的痛苦，甚至比逃避的痛苦更为强烈．神经官能症由此成了更棘手的问题。不少人为逃避新的问题和痛苦，不断以神经官能症为替代品，导致息上各种心理疾病。所幸也有人能坦然面对神经官能症，及时寻求心理医生帮助，以正确的心态面对人生正常的痛苦。事实上，如果不顾一切地逃避问题和痛苦，就会由此失去以解决问题推动心灵成长的契机，导致心理疾病越来越严重，而长期的、慢性的心理疾病，就会使人的心灵停止生长。不及时治疗，心灵就会萎缩和退化，心智就永远难以成熟。

Therefore let us inculcate（教育） in ourselves and in our children the means of achieving mental and spiritual health. By this I mean let us teach ourselves and our children the necessity for suffering and the value thereof（由此）, the need to face problems directly and to experience the pain involved. I have stated that discipline is the basic set of tools we require to solve life's problems. It will become clear that these tools are techniques of suffering, means by which we experience the pain of problems in such a way as to work them through and solve them successfully, learning and growing in the process. When we teach ourselves and our children discipline, we are teaching them and ourselves how to suffer and also how to grow.

正确的做法是：我们要让我们自己，也要让我们的孩子认识到，人生的问题和痛苦具有非凡的价值。勇于承担责任，敢于面对困难，才能够使心灵变得健康。自律，是解决人生问题的首要工具，也是消除人生痛苦的重要手段。通过自律，我们就知道在面对问题时，如何以坚毅、果敢的态度，从学习与成长中获得益处。我们教育自己和孩子自律。也是在教育我们双方如何忍受痛苦，获得成长。

What are these tools, these techniques of suffering, these means of experiencing the pain of problems constructively that I call discipline? There are four: delaying of gratification, acceptance of responsibility, dedication to truth, and balancing. As will be evident, these are not complex tools whose application demands extensive training. To the contrary, they are simple tools, and almost all children are adept in（善于） their use by the age of ten. Yet presidents and kings will often forget to use them, to their own downfall（垮台）. The problem lies not in the complexity of these tools but in the will to use them. For they are tools with which pain is confronted rather than avoided, and if one seeks to avoid legitimate suffering, then one will avoid the use of these tools. Therefore, after analyzing each of these tools, we shall in the next section examine the will to use them, which is love.

【译文】自律究竟包括哪些技巧呢?如何通过自律，消除人生的痛苦呢?简单地说，所谓自律，是以积极而主动的态度，去解决人生痛苦的重要原则，主要包括四个方面：推迟满足感、承担责任、尊重事实、保持平衡。它们并不复杂，不过要想正确地运用它们，你需要细心体会，广泛实践。它们其实相当简单．即便是十岁的小孩，也能够最终掌握。不过有时候，即使贵为一国之君，也会因忽略和漠视它们而遭到报复，自取灭亡。实践这些原则，关键在于你的态度，你要敢于面对痛苦而非逃避。 对于时刻想着逃避痛苦的人，这些原则不会起到任何作用，他们也绝不会从自律中获益。接下来，我要对这几种原则深入阐述，然后再探讨它们背后的原动力——爱。

相关文章：格兰特船长的儿女读后感